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Fellas would fancy you, especially now that you have learned how to plough a field.” They give me tips for internet dating. I signed up for internet dating, on a whim, early one Sunday morning, after yet another weekend on my own with my mutt. Oh gawd, the template online is looking for a photograph. It’s times like this that a burka seems like an attractive form of dress in middle Ireland. I feel like giving up there and then and resigning myself to old age, with just me and my handsome mutt. So before I declare myself fit for pasture, I did it. He’s much better looking than me and it would show what an animal lover I am. I opt for honesty and remind myself, several times that there is nothing wrong with online dating. My likes, dislikes, inspirations, the ‘tell us about you’ and ‘what you are looking for’. My brothers have already said, half joking, but deadly serious, that, given my success rate, that they will screen any future suitors.

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Love may blossom over the office water-cooler or in the meal-for-one frozen food section of your local supermarket, but for others, the perfect partner might prove harder to meet.

The speculation about who we’ll snog at midnight makes everyone single nauseously dread the turn of the year for fear of being exposed as somehow unlovable.

This singletons version of the lethal injection is creeping up on us yet again with December looming and NYE waiting to make a laughing stock of anyone unlucky enough not to have a significant other at their side to make them feel valid.

They also said the woman went straight back onto Tinder the morning after the alleged rape and had conversations with a number of different men.

In her evidence this morning the woman told the court that initial contact had been made on Tinder followed by text messages on Whatsapp.